singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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