She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize