So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
