Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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