but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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