Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
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