Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
