I just cut my nipple shaving
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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