no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
