i just google imaged poop.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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