Dual....:-)
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
Randomize
