all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize