At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Randomize