yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
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