We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
