Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize