Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
