i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize