so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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