I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
