im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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