i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
