Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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