420 ftw
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
