Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
