Me. At least after what I've been through.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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