I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
