Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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