i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize