I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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