Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
