I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
