she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
