I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
last night I used snow as a chaser
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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