the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
We were destined to go to rehab together
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Randomize
