You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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