this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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