TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize