I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Just cropdusted the office
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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