you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
