Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
