Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
God, you're like boner-b-gone
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize