fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize