just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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