then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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