everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
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