Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
