May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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