when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
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