Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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