I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
it was like having sex with a tree stump
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
